One word: Intimacy.
And by intimacy, I don’t mean S-E-X. Unless of course I’m talking about 50 Shades of Gray.
And I didn’t really read 50 Shades of Gray this weekend. No time for that! I read the first two books last month. But I’ve been trying to figure out a way to work in commentary about it and BINGO! I figured it out today.
Friday night I attended homecoming at my alma mater, Wittenberg University. Saturday I managed to do kid activities from 8am to 4:30 pm. Then I topped it off with heading down to Ohio State’s campus for the Nebraska game.
What was the best part of the weekend?
It’s all about the intimacy.
Buckeye tailgates are a blast. Truly. High energy, lots of camaraderie, drinking, music, a shared interest in the game. Everyone’s friends with everyone for the day. But no one knows each other. Bonding with friends at Ohio State University is, to me, a surface kind of bonding. Superficial. Not fake, though – everyone’s very genuine about their love of the game and the team and the institution. But there aren’t deeper connections. For me, there’s no deep abiding love of the place. No visceral connection because my formative years were spent there. I’m sure other people do have that deep connection.
With an enrollment close to 60,000 there have to be deep connections, right?
I spent my formative years at Wittenberg University, population 2000. So that’s where I spent Friday night. Bonding with friends. Friends I shared strong connections with for years. I don’t think of Wittenberg as a place to watch football or a place to root for one of the best teams in the land. I doubt many people do.
My connection to Wittenberg is mainly because of the people I met there Friday night. The moment we met up on Friday the laughter began and didn’t end until the Big Man and I drove home. The stories we shared are stories that shaped all of us while we were there. There were no big screen TVs with eyes glued to the screen, screaming frantically at touchdowns and high fiving people we’d never met. It was all about each other, not football or the institution itself.
Me with my best college friends.
And I left Wittenberg Friday night feeling a little more complete. Fulfilled. Feeling, finally, like I’ve figured out my “Now What” from a few weeks ago.
Everything about this weekend was superb, top notch. But none of it would have been fun had it not been for one man. My man. I didn’t go to Wittenberg to enjoy my college friends without him. I took him with me, because I didn’t want to be there unless he was with me.
And he had just as good a time as I did. Which makes me love him even more. That he could enjoy seeing me bond with a bunch of guys he’s barely met and walk away saying, “I loved seeing that side of you.”
And I’d never go to an OSU tailgate without him. What would the point be in that?
Me with the love of my life. The one on the right. Not the crazy guy over my shoulder on the left. But I do admire his moxie!
He’s my life partner, my best friend. Everything in life I strive for is because of my love for him and the family we’ve created. Everything else in life is a distant, distant second.
And 50 Shades? It really has nothing to do with any of this. I’ve just been looking for a reason to work it in. It was vapid, a little (lot) gross, poorly written and completely unbelievable. Completely.
And yet. I kept turning the pages. So something in it drew me in. Maybe as one friend said, I read it to know what pop culture is determining as “normal” or “hip.” Though I hope that’s not the case. Ew.
What I do know though? I don’t want my kids to ever read these books and think “this is what a real love story is supposed to be like.”
I want them to look at their Dad and I and say, “THIS is what a real love story’s supposed to be like.”
So true about 50 Shades and yes love doesn’t look like that, even though the 3rd book does tie everything up in a pretty bow.
I went to a small college and yes to it being all about those great lasting relationships.
I agree, totally.
I may have to read the 3rd one after all because I’d like things to get tied up in a tidy bow!
We have our high school reunion next month. My husband doesn’t want to go. I think it is worth at least stopping by.
And I agree, 50 Shades is not real in any capacity. It’s fantasy – and that’s why we keep reading. It’s the whole “what will they do next” hook.
So true! I hope you go to your reunion!
I love Scott’s college reunions. My college was tiny. Chatfield has periodic alumni gatherings, but my graduating class had 17 or so. Maybe mine was the year of 31. But anyway, I’m pretty sure it’s been in the last two years that the school’s graduates have started to number in the hundreds rather than the tens. So we go to Wooster. And I LOVE it. There’s tons for non alumni (AND alumni kids) to do all weekend, and I get to meet Scott’s friends from college, and the people who he knew in passing, and it’s just kickass awesome good fun. We try to go every five years. The most recent was last year, and I’m already counting down to 2016!
Sounds awesome!
Sounds like you had a fun weekend.
I only read the first 50 shades book and I really hated it! Definitely not what a love story should be.
I liked the second one slightly better. But only slightly.
Totally agree.
I agree with you 100% on 50 shades. I never got through the first book because it was just that bad. And I admire your connection to your man so very much – and what a great way to show your kids what a real love story looks like. Well said! xo
I may have to finish the final one just to say I read them all, but bleh.
Loved those last two sentences of your post. I have not read the books yet (mostly time) however I’ve hear a LOT about them
and I’ve never been able to pinpoint the issues I had with them until reading the last two sentences of this post.
P.S. I have not been getting your feed on my Google Readers!!!!!!! Arg! What’s wrong with Google Reader!? Today 10 new post showed up from you (all old) and that’s when I went to your home page… Now I definitely have to play catch-up
I made the switch to WordPress and feedburner just needed a little time to “catch up” and some tweaking. I think we’re all good now!
I still haven’t read 50 Shades of Grey and i don’t think I ever will. I’ve had many people tell me to read it but I’m just not interested. I’s much rather re-read Twilight for the 100th time!!!
Awww, I love this post! And I loved all the pics of you, that was the best part. What is it about starring at my fellow beautiful bloggers that makes me so joyful! …ahem…and your husband isn’t hard on the eyes either. That Gray fellow has nothing on him, I’m sure.
So awesome that you guys are so in love. That is the love story your girls will model! Your husbsnd is the man whose values they will seek out in their future partners. So bravo for choosing him and staying so in love!
I love the last few paragraphs. I want the same thing you described – for my kids to look at your marriage and be inspired by your love story.
I know I am!! Well done on every count!
Thanks, Mary! It was such a great weekend, made even greater by some of my realizations!
I love you.
I love coming here – because I love everything about you. And… it makes me smile and love being around. Thanks for sharing your piece of happiness.
Awwww. You just made my day! Thanks, Kristen!